I spent most of this past year traveling the world with my wife as part of a time off work. We were taking a sabbatical before we start the next stage of our lives – having children. We spent almost 9 months in Latin America, Europe, and Asia. In total, I’ve spent about 18 months…
Tag: Identity
Are dignity and self-respect different from self-esteem?
When I was a kid self-esteem began to be promoted in schools. A lot of adults seemed to have a problem with it, but almost nothing is more conformist to the next idea than education. It’s a part of teachers’ identity to always be doing the next thing. So it stuck. At the time, I…
Why you need a vision, a plan, and a minimum
If you’re a mature man, you have some sense of your values and your vision in your life. Boys and young men often don’t know what they want – or they may know many things they want, but have not actually decided what’s most important to them. But a man has made some basic decisions…
Do you know where you come from?
“We can chart our future clearly and wisely only when we know the path which has led to the present.” Human beings are unique in being able to learn from the experience of others. We are also highly social beings unable to function without having a place in a group. We need to know who…
What Shame, Pride, Honor, And Guilt Are For
What is left when honor is lost? — Publilius Syrus In this article I want to discuss a set of emotions we feel around our actions, and how they relate to what we do. We often misunderstand these powerful emotions both in terms of what they are and what causes them. This leads to emotional debate of…
The Value Of Reading Biography
The search after the great men is the dream of youth and the most serious occupation of manhood. –Ralph Waldo Emerson It is not the situation which makes the man, but the man who makes the situation.–Frederick William Robertson There is a debate among historians that is similar to the ‘nature vs nurture’ debate in…
Do you know who your people are?
“There are two questions a man must ask himself: The first is ‘Where am I going?’ and the second is ‘Who will go with me?’ If you ever get these questions in the wrong order you are in trouble.” –Sam Keen Masculinity has taken many forms in many cultures, but the core of it is always…
Recognizing The False Trichotomy Of Mind, Body, and Soul
Our culture has become used to thinking of these three things – mind, body, and soul – as separate spheres. We don’t always say it like that, but it’s evident in the assumptions behind our speech and stereotypes. We believe that people have fundamental personalities and memories separate from their stage of life or mental…
Is Toxic Masculinity a real or helpful concept?
Today we hear terms like ‘fragile men’ and ‘toxic masculinity.’ If you are a young man you will hear those things not only out in the world, but even sometimes in school. This leads to the danger that young men will start believing that these are true descriptions of masculinity. There are a lot of…